Well, what's the use in complaining when you've got what you don't need?

Yet another poster deconstruction. I'm very curious about how many other people's productivity is set into a severe downward spiral simply through the act of going to the bathroom...

They're all actors, looking at themselves in the mirror backwards

So, I've been spending a lot of time in the library recently, which is not my preferred study place, but alas, I have too many books to haul back and forth between coffeeshops. One of the consequences of my time in the library is that I have been over-exposed to the life and conversations of undergraduates. This experience has proven to be both humorous and horrifying and has inspired a new feature that I'm calling:

Shit undergrads say (and the things that grad students think in response).

Enjoy!

If you had a different attitude, instead of take and take and take

In another unexpected turn of events, I woke up in a pretty good mood this morning and was actually fairly productive for the first half of the day. As a result, I kept a list of things that made me smile and/or laugh.

Overflow, Shake a fist, Howling at, The emptiness

In an unexpected turn of events, I actually LOVE this poster found in a bathroom in the library...

The birth was quick, but the death is slow...

So, I'm currently studying for my comprehensive exams (yes, I know that I'm actually currently procrastinating from studying for my comprehensive exams by writing this post, but in general...I'm "studying"). Being required to read a book a day, which usually contains absurd amounts of inane and unnecessary "theory" (although, what is "theory," really?) has not only had both negative and positive effects on my life, but has prompted me to deconstruct the minutia of these effects to the point that they are simultaneously meaningless and hugely significant on a metaphysical level (to be clear, I employ the terms "I" and "me" merely as linguistic conventions because I do recognize that none of us has a coherent and independent subjectivity outside of the power relations that define every single aspect of our existence. I mean, obviously.). Anyway, if that last parenthetical note didn't send you running to the bathroom to vomit, and you want to feel better about your own life, feel free to continue reading about mine...

Open my eyes, but I never see anything...

Yesterday, as I was making my way toward my prison cell office in the library, I caught a glimpse of my reflection in the glass door and, well, let's just say...it wasn't pretty. I instantly wished that I was with someone who could take my picture, because I imagined a magazine-style blog post with arrows pointing to all of the things about my appearance that mark me as a grad student (if only because figuring out how to add said arrows would require hours of worthless procrastination). As an aspiring ethnographer, however, I decided that attempting to describe my appearance could be a helpful exercise (and, therefore, not an entirely wasted activity). So, after the jump, enjoy an excerpt from my forthcoming book "Portrait of a Graduate Student as a Rapidly Aging Young Woman." (p.s....this post is long and not for the faint-of-heart procrastinators)

But with an attitude that says, "Hands-off, you're just not good enough"

I've started a forthcoming post about the ways in which studying for my comprehensive exams has impacted my life, namely by pushing me to new extremes of procrastination. One way that I've procrastinated in the past few months is OkCupid. This free dating website can be a very welcome time-suck when necessary and, on rare occasions, I'll receive messages that make me feel better about myself, if only because they reinforce how absurd and idiotic people are. Anyway, as an act of sheer procrastination/distraction, I agreed to go on a date with an OkCupid guy last night. After the jump, I reveal a list of things to do and/or not to do when you're on a first date with me (mostly things NOT to do)...