But with an attitude that says, "Hands-off, you're just not good enough"

I've started a forthcoming post about the ways in which studying for my comprehensive exams has impacted my life, namely by pushing me to new extremes of procrastination. One way that I've procrastinated in the past few months is OkCupid. This free dating website can be a very welcome time-suck when necessary and, on rare occasions, I'll receive messages that make me feel better about myself, if only because they reinforce how absurd and idiotic people are. Anyway, as an act of sheer procrastination/distraction, I agreed to go on a date with an OkCupid guy last night. After the jump, I reveal a list of things to do and/or not to do when you're on a first date with me (mostly things NOT to do)...

I can bitch the best at your social do's...

In honor of my return to Boston for a few days to visit my friend, Greg, I thought I would return to the old ways of describing how I have wasted my time... Enjoy! (Unless you're not Greg...in which case you will likely not find any of this even remotely funny)